if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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