You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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