So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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