New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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