He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
