Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
