Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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