At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
You need a sexual gate keeper
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
