No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
