Nicole vs. Life
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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