i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Michael Bay diarrhea
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
