My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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