Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
Randomize
