I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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