HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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