she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Randomize
