Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
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