I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
