carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize
