so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
