What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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