Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
