Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
you didnt know i had herpes?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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