I skipped work to stalk him.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
and you fell through a lawn chair
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
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