everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
