I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
