Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
