Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
