just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
