I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
