the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
