I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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