I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
