I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
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