This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
