the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
