garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
