their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
