I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
