lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Randomize
