i'm signing you up for texting rehab
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
