Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
