me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
this just has baby written all over it
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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