I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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