This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
You can't special order awesome
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Randomize
