Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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