i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
