let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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