do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
