I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
